Memories from Mackinaw. And "Mackinac." (Love those Brits.)

My house resembles a war zone. My dogs need some focused attention. The kids start school in a month and we're not even close to ready. I have half a dozen half-baked projects scattered all over the place. And I am just beginning to tame the laundry. Oh, and there may be things growing in the refrigerator that could be considered uncivilized.

But I wouldn't change any of it if I had to give up the weekend I just spent with my girl.

Rachel and I camped for two nights with her Girl Scout troop in Mackinaw City, and spent all day Saturday on Mackinac Island. It was Rachel's first time seeing the Mackinac Bridge and visiting the island, and I am so glad I got to experience that with her.

 

On a shopping excursion Rachel had her fortune read by the creepy-looking gypsy lady in the box. Part of her fortune said, "Your cool thinking sees you through a mishap with a Taurus or Leo ..."

I'm a Leo. Ha!

Fortunately we didn't have any mishaps over the weekend. Except that Saturday was my birthday, and I did get pooped on by a bird. At least it wasn't in my hair. Happy birthday to me!

Getting ready to board the ferry to Mackinac Island. Rach was a little nervous. She got over it.

One of the horses that pulled our carriage on the first leg of our tour. The tour company uses each team for only four hours at a time, and we were lucky enough to be able to watch the handlers switch our team for fresh horses. They are all very good - and quick - at what they do!

 This was the 3-horse team for the final leg of our tour. That's Wade on the right. He was moving a little slow that day, so the tour guide was fussing at him (good-naturedly). Look at that face ...

One of our stops was at the Butterfly House.

It was awesome. The girls loved it. And I had a new camera to play with.

Beautiful butterfly pictures!

Rachel pointed out that this butterfly looks like a fish. And there was a little pond just to the right ... so he looks like he's about to jump in! Can you see the fish?

 One of my favorites landed on Rachel's finger.

 

 And she had a couple land on her hoodie.

 I think this is my favorite photo. I love the blue of the butterfly against those huge, green leaves.

 The carriage tour also took us by the cemeteries. If I had a little more time I would have loved to walk around and take more pictures there.

 Military cemetery.

Another stop on the tour:

 The view from Arch Rock down the shoreline.

 After our tour, Rach and I rented bikes and just rode around for a while. It was SO busy on the island that day! We even got in a little traffic jam involving bicycles, horse-drawn wagons and carriages ... we decided to get off our bikes and walk them through that.

 We took a little loop that goes right along the shoreline and stopped for a few minutes to take in the view.

 Me and my girl.

 A view of the Mackinac Bridge on our way back to the mainland. It had been overcast all day and it was a chilly ride back in the evening.

We had a fantastic time. I always feel so blessed (and exhausted!) after we spend time with Rachel's GS troop. The girls all get along so well and I love spending time with the moms, too - several of us go way back, but I consider each of them friends - and we're a good mix of cooks, nurturers, planners, outdoorsy-types. And thankfully, everyone has a great sense of humor. Because when your dinner burns and the craft project doesn't work out as planned and the campfire is mostly billowing smoke, a sense of humor comes in pretty handy.

Happy Friday! It's birthday sleepover weekend.

Yesterday was Rachel's 11th birthday.

Are you ready for the cliché? Yeah? Time flies, people. It does.

 Rachel, age 6.

Age 11.

As Rach was helping me prepare our taco buffet for the family get-together last night, she asked me how I was feeling 11 years ago at that time. I told her that at about 4:30 the afternoon of the day she was born I was excited, scared, probably in a little bit of pain, and sad that my mama would miss the birth of my second baby because she was in Florida.

We had not found out the sex of either of our children before they were born, so I had no idea we were having a girl. And frankly, I had somehow convinced myself I was having another boy, so that's what I was prepared for. I was astounded - pleasantly surprised - when Rachel was born and the doctor told us our baby was a girl. A girl! A baby sister for Sammy! Even when I called my parents in Florida and told my mom the baby had arrived and we were both fine (praise Jesus, because that girl put me through the wringer before she made her appearance and I, in turn, put Steve and everyone else who was there through the wringer), I heard mom breathe that sigh of relief, and then ... "Mom, it's a girl" ... and I think my mom danced a jig right there on the other end of the line.

Ahhhh. I think we must never get tired of telling our "birth day" stories, do we? I remember some of the silliest details about the days my kids were born, but half the time I can't tell you what I had for breakfast this morning. Whether they realize it or not, much of my world revolves around the two of them. I wouldn't have it any other way.

And so, this afternoon I will pick Rachel and three of her friends up from school (Sam, poor dear, will ride the bus home and hang out with Grandpa), I will take this gaggle of girls to have manicures, we will eat pizza, and celebrate Rachel's Year of Eleven. Said celebration also involves a sleepover, so please pray for me!

Happy Friday.

Our baby turns 10 today.

This calls for a movie.

It's hard to believe 10 years have passed already.

I'm so proud to be this beautiful girl's mama.

*sniff sniff*

Monday. And there is much to do.

Poor Ladybug is so confused. Daddy was here and now he's gone. The kids were here, now gone. And I'm not always here, but here I am today. And I'm buzzing around the house, cleaning and straightening and tripping over her because she is hot on my heels. When she's not following me around she's sitting in a chair by the window keeping watch.

 See?

I feel for her. The last few days have been a bit of a whirlwind and we're all out of our usual routine. It was so nice, as always, to have Steve home. He hit the road around 4 this morning to go back to PA. I imagine it will be spring break before we see him again. Boo. Sad face. Sad, sad face.

The good news is we definitely made the most of his time here. At the last minute we decided to take Rachel to a local hotel with a pool and water slide because that's what she wanted for her birthday - to swim. Actually she wanted a big ol' par-tay by the pool, but she settled for inviting one friend for one night at the hotel, eating out at her place of choice (that's kind of our birthday tradition) and cupcakes in the hotel room. Her birthday is tomorrow and she will turn 10. Ten big ones. Hardly seems possible. I'll bake a cake and we'll do a little something special for her tomorrow evening, too. Today is all about catching up on the stuff I ignored while Steve was here ... the usual: laundry, dishes, bills, and general housekeeping. And while I am sad he is gone again, I am definitely enjoying the quiet time alone, and I have plenty to do to keep myself busy.

Clean Slate Sunday: 2.19.12 edition

I am sooo tired. So I'm gonna' make a few notes here and then hit the sack and hopefully get rested up for another busy week ahead.

All last week I felt like I was playing catch-up and never quite got there. Today, one simple thing made me feel like I was finally (almost) on top of things: after we got home from church and before we left the house again for Rachel's Girl Scout meeting I put a roast in the slow cooker for dinner. So when we got home late this afternoon I baked some potato slices for chips to go along with our pork BBQ sandwiches, and the kids and I actually had a home-cooked meal - something other than frozen dinners popped in the microwave - for the first time in several days.

Not that there is anything wrong with frozen dinners.

Family meals are important to me. Whether we kick back in the living room and watch Jeopardy while we eat, or talk with each other around the dining room table, I appreciate the time we spend together when we gather for a meal.

This week part of my plan is to inventory what we have in the freezers and make a menu. Steve will be home for a few days later this week to see his dad and Rachel for their respective birthdays, and I'd like to make his visit as relaxing as possible. Family meals, a clean house to come home to ... that will make it relaxing for me, anyway. Heh.

First, a little reading and a good, long sleep.

Have a blessed week, y'all.

Just ... stuff.

Well hallelujah, Sam returned home from his first evening skiing with not a bump or bruise or broken anything. (!!!) As it should be. And on the 20-minute ride home from school - in which I was a wee bit tired because it was after 10 p.m. - he talked 100 miles an hour about who he hung out with, how he has to take lessons before he can ride the ski lift, what size his boots were, what he had for dinner, and on and on. And he cannot wait for next Wednesday to roll around. I love it.

He also talked about how cool it is that the kids are trusted to go off and ski, get a bite to eat whenever they are ready, and then meet back at the bus at a designated time. Ya' know what that's called? FREEDOM! I think he's pretty excited about that.

~ ~ ~

Today is Steve's birthday. Happy birthday, baby! I'm a little out-of-sorts because he doesn't get a signal on his cell phone where he's staying, so we aren't able to chat in the evenings like we usually do. But he called this morning and it was so good to hear his voice ... and I was able to tell him "happy birthday" when I finally remembered today is the 6th. Once the kids were both up and alert enough to talk, they called him and wished him a happy day, too.

This is the second year I haven't been able to be with Steve on his big day, and that kinda' bums me out. Birthdays are a big deal to me. But I can't complain because he's working and that's a good thing!

~ ~ ~

Poor Rachel has a dentist appointment this afternoon because she chipped a tooth. Or rather, a tooth chipped and she has no idea how it happened. So we're going to have that checked out and have her teeth cleaned and the usual X-rays and all that while she's there.

Do you think it would be too much to expect that once her sore tooth is taken care of her attitude would improve? Sheesh. Here's hoping.

~ ~ ~

Me? I've been on a housecleaning kick. Time to move some furniture around, catch all the dust bunnies and make everything look fresh. The Christmas trees come down tonight. We typically wait until Jan. 6 because a) we usually have a big bonfire for Steve's and his brother's birthday (yes, they share a birthday - his brother is exactly five years older), and b) it signifies Epiphany on the church calendar. We don't have plans for a bonfire this year, but it will be a good opportunity to remind the kids that the Christmas season doesn't necessarily end on December 25th.

Have a great day, y'all. TGIF!

Post Christmas lull ... and good news!

Two days after Christmas and it still kinda' looks like Santa's elves had a party up in here. And I am just now starting to feel like the cookies and candies and cheese and crackers and all that good stuff is beginning to wear off.

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas. We sure did. It was quiet - on Christmas Eve we made our annual cookie deliveries to neighbors/friends, then went to the candlelight service at church, then hung out at my in-laws' and did our gift exchange with them. Christmas morning the kids slept until a little after 7:30 (a Christmas miracle!) and then the four of us opened gifts and spent the rest of the day just enjoying each other's company. Sam was so happy with his new ski goggles and helmet that he wore them around the house most of the day, thoroughly cracking me up.

More than ever before, I just can't express how happy I am to be surrounded by family and friends this year. We have been blessed beyond measure.

It's been so nice to laze around and do a whole lot of nothing these last few days, but I'm feeling the pull to get back into a routine and get the house cleaned up and all the baubles put away. Just in time, I suppose, as Steve got the call today that he's been waiting for: he's starting a new job next week. Praise God. And that's all I'm gonna' say about that for now.

In other news, for the first time in ... shoot, maybe ever ... Steve and I have plans to go out on New Year's Eve! Neither of us is really into large gatherings of people, but we're going to brave it for one night to go out with another couple to dinner and then to our little town's version of a NYE ball drop. It will be nice to do something with just the adults, and I imagine this will be a bit of an early celebration for Steve's birthday (which is January 6th and by that time he'll be in Pennsylvania working).

I'm looking forward to 2012. This year has been a great year in many ways for our family, but I'm ready to leave some of the struggles behind, take what we've learned from them, and put some positive energy into making the year ahead even better than this one.

Happy Birthday, Sammy!

Today our boy turns 13. As I write I have cinnamon rolls baking in the oven for him while he is out hunting with his daddy. Later we'll have a party at the bowling alley, complete with the double-layer rainbow confetti cake he requested and several of his friends.

Thirteen is a big one, isn't it? Sam is becoming a young man right before our eyes. Where we once had a teeny five-pound baby there is now an adult-size being living among us. It sure does give me pause.

There is so much I could say about Sam. We have had our share of struggles, he and I. But for as much as he resisted anyone's attempts to soften him up with hugs and kisses and love beyond measure over the years, he has transformed into one of the most amazing, compassionate and loving children I know.

I am particularly touched by Sam's gift with younger children. He has this comfortable way of engaging kids that makes me believe teaching or a similar occupation may be his calling.

I am proud of this young man and who he is becoming. Even if I still call him my baby boy, I know day by day he is gaining independence and establishing his own place in this world. It will be a while yet before he faces it on his own, but I know after one more year of middle school, once he hits high school it will be over in the blink of an eye. That's why I'm taking time to enjoy it - and him - while I can.

Happy birthday, sweet boy. Today is your day. We love you.

I'm wallowing.

After giving my friend B the rundown of what a crazy week we had last week, and then whining because this one had gotten off on only a slightly better note, B sent me this in an e-mail:

"Here's my unsolicited advice: after celebrating Rachel's bday, take a few more days and wallow, nap, etc. then, when you are so tired of it all, declare it over."

And that was just what I needed to read.

My friend B (I should give her a blog identity ... like Bertha ... or Beatrice) has been incredibly supportive, not just through recent life events but through ongoing struggles of parenting and attempts at self-improvement.

While I sat at my dying grandmother's bedside, B would send me e-mails (that I would pick up on my cell phone) with words of encouragement or humor, never expecting a response but making sure I knew someone was thinking of me right that moment. It meant the world to me.

So now, having gotten the permission I felt like I needed to do ... well, absolutely nothing ... I am wallowing.

I went back to bed after I got the kids off to school this morning and now I'm having a brunch of M&M's and Diet Dr. Pepper and some yogurt-covered pretzel balls carefully plucked from the bucket o' snack mix I bought last weekend. I'm tired and emotionally spent. Yesterday was my daughter's birthday and thank God I have amazing in-laws who made dinner and had cake for her - and the rest of us. We had celebrated over the weekend with a movie and meal out at Rachel's choice of places, but it's not the same as having cake on your birthday and I didn't even have the energy to go to the bakery and pick one up.

See? I have children to tend to and regular stuff that needs to be taken care of, so no matter how many people tell me to take it easy for a few days, it's hard to do just that. But I know eventually B will tell me to "suck it up, Buttercup!" and force me to put the M&M's away and get on with it. And I will. But today? And probably tomorrow? I'm wallowing. And that's that.

~ ~ ~

I need to say thank you. Thank you to all my friends and family who have prayed for us and sent good vibes our way and who called and sent messages via blog and e-mail and snail mail. It's been a week since grandma died and I promise I won't be writing about her forever but no matter how much we prepare for it - how ready we think we are - it hurts to lose someone we love. I feel like a piece of my heart is missing and it will take some time to figure out how to fill that empty space. Or to just live with it.

Anyway, thanks for your support. It's March now and spring is just around the corner and I'm inspired to do some sprucing up around the house. As soon as the wallowing is complete the fun will begin again.

Happy birthday, sweetheart.

Today is Steve's birthday. As we were chatting last night it occurred to me I have been with him - literally, in his presence - for each of his birthdays since he turned 18. I mentioned it to him and he couldn't remember a time before this year that I hadn't been there to help him celebrate on his big day either.

So it's a little bittersweet. I'm sorry I can't be there to crack a beer open with him when he finishes work for the day. But it's not my day, so I'm not gonna' whine (anymore). I'll just share this interesting family factoid: Steve and his brother share the same birthday.

Five years apart.

Steve is the younger (and taller) one.

Can you imagine? Happy 5th birthday, honey! Here's a baby brother for you!

It seems to have worked out fine for these two. They have no other siblings and they are the best of friends.

This birthday makes for an interesting milestone. Steve is now 36 and I'm 34 and that means we've been a couple for half our entire lives. Funny, huh? 'Cause now we spend most of our daily lives apart. Go figure.

As the years go by it keeps getting better, though.

Happy birthday, baby. Cheers!

Happy birthday, buddy.

Today provides all the proof I need that Steve and I are good parents: we let Sam live to see his 12th birthday.

I'm only partially kidding.

Despite Sam's tendency to push us to our limits, stretch our resources, and make us question our sanity on a regular basis, our son really is a gift. Literally, his name means "asked of God" or "heard by God." I feel so privileged to have been chosen as his mother, and I can't imagine life without him.

The day we said goodbye to our beloved Razi. 

Sam made me promise to bring her collar home.

Who else would make me laugh like Sam does? Who else would force me to be so creative? Without Sam, how on earth could I have learned how every single emotion really feels, and how it feels to experience all of them in a 24-hour period?

Sam is a young man of many talents. He is an artist - his tools a #2 pencil and a piece of paper. He is incredibly curious and will satisfy that curiosity by deconstructing and reconstructing things. I love that he has rhythm and a great singing voice, though he is usually too shy to share it.

Sam is adventurous. He's a daredevil. He is always trying new tricks on his bicycle, and if you catch him on the right day he will take at least one bite of any new food you put in front of him. He figured out he likes mushrooms and black olives on his pizza (he is my son, after all). He likes to dip broccoli in KFC gravy. He also has a wicked sweet tooth.

He adores his daddy. And like Steve, Sam plays his cards close to the vest. Perish the thought that anyone would know he is excited or eager about anything.

 

At the races.

Incidentally, I cherish the moments I see that he clearly is excited because I just want him to be happy. I want him to be a good citizen, a productive member of society, God-loving-and-fearing, but above all, happy.

Boy, don't you worry you'll find yourself

Follow your heart and nothing else
And you can do this, oh baby if you try
All that I want for you my son is to be satisfied

And be a simple kind of man
Be something you love and understand
Baby, be a simple kind of man
Oh, won't you do this for me, son, if you can?

~ Lynyrd Skynyrd

 

 

 We love ya, kiddo - unconditionally. Happy birthday.

Babies, babies everywhere!

Steve and I have been out of the baby business for years.

Wait. That didn't sound quite right.

Let's just say we made sure it was not physically possible to have any more children after our Rachel was born. It took me a couple of years to convince Steve it was in his our best interest to make sure it wouldn't happen. And - God bless the man - he took care of business. We love our children and I adored their sweet baby faces, but both of them just about killed me when it came time for labor and delivery (OK, that's a slight exaggeration for Child #1, but not so much for Child #2) and even the doctor who delivered Rachel asked at my six-week postnatal checkup, and I quote: "You aren't going to do this again, are you?"

I was 26 and felt blessed beyond measure to have one boy and one girl. I am now 34 and I have never regretted the deliberate decision to not have any more children.

Sam, age 3, and Rachel, 5 months.

You know what makes it easy, though? Friends who have babies!

I have been so fortunate to have plenty of girlfriends over the years who, as my babies grew into toddlerhood and beyond, have had children and who have been willing to share those babies with me so I can sniff their precious heads and squeeze their chubby little thighs. Usually 20 minutes of bouncing playfully with a laughing babe or cuddling quietly with a sleeping babe is enough to fill any void I thought I might be feeling about not having any more wee ones around the house.

In the past year alone, at least four families close to us have welcomed new babies into their worlds and I have just about burst with joy for each of them. Having a baby - or another baby, or a third or fourth baby - changes our lives forever and I am so glad to be able to celebrate with friends as they become parents.

The latest of the new additions occurred just this morning, and I am elated for our friends A & J. I can't wait to hold their sweet baby girl and hug my friends and welcome them to the most rewarding, exhausting, exhilarating, frustrating, heartwarming, insanity-inducing, blessed job in the world: parenthood.

Highlights.

Dang. Has it been only a week since I updated here? It feels like it's been an eternity.

Look what I found! A few pictures from Vacation Bible School that I forgot I had taken.

 Rachel by the "campfire" on our island. The fire isn't real, but it looks pretty cool in the picture, eh?

Pastor Bill giving the Bible story of the day. We totally take over the sanctuary with our decorations, as you can see.

We wore these bracelets all week, reminding us to "Watch for God." Every day the kids reported their "God sightings" to the leaders.

~ ~ ~

Remember when I said August would be a breeze? Well. It's been fun so far, but no less busy than July was.

Highlights.

• Steve was injured at work. He's fine (really), but it required a drug test per company policy. It also required a tetanus shot and a round of antibiotics. He drug tested on Friday, then decided to come home to wait out the results which typically take two business days. It was nice to have him here, despite the circumstances.

• When Steve came home he traded trucks with me because his work truck needs some hefty repairs. I am so. sick. of repairing vehicles. Really. 

• Speaking of repairs, my computer caught a nasty virus a couple days ago. Can anybody tell me what the point of a computer virus is? Why devise a computer virus that completely locks up my computer except to pop up a porn site when my 11-yr-old tries to play a game on-line. Seriously? I hope you're proud of yourself, computerviruswriter. I hope you've gotten your kicks out of that one. Three words: karma's a bitch.

• My grandmother turned 82 years old on Sunday. I went to see her after church. She no longer drives, but still lives in her house by herself. She watches a lot of Food Network. She told me at her age she's not afraid of dying because she's done everything she's going to do with her life. "Once your partner is gone there's not even anyone to get mad at except the TV," she said. We laughed. My grandfather died eight years ago.

• I turned 34 on Tuesday. Thirty-four still feels relatively young to me. I read once that we are eternally the age of 25 in our minds. Somehow I don't think my grandma feels 25 anymore. I don't think she has felt 25 for a long, long time. I hope I'll still be changing the world and impacting God's kingdom when I'm 82. 

The rest has been a whirlwind of spending time with friends and family, eating together, drinking together, sharing the bounty of our harvests, splashing in the pool, reading for the pure joy of it, taking long afternoon naps, and counting the weeks until school starts in the fall.

What? Hey, I'm having fun but these kids have been spending an awful lot of time together and at times one would think they were put on this earth to make each other (or me) crazy. I have resorted to forcing them both into the bathroom together, closing the door, and telling them they cannot come out until they've worked out whatever it is they were screaming about.

I've only had to do that once. So far.

Five weeks to go. Tick tock.

Clean Slate Sunday: 2.28.10 edition

I slept through the USA v Canada Olympic hockey game this afternoon. Shameful, I know. I have been staying up late nearly every night over the past two weeks allowing the Olympics to keep me company after the kids went to bed. But after a long week and a jam-packed weekend I just couldn't take it anymore and the couch was calling my name.

Rachel enjoyed her birthday weekend which included a roller skating party with a few friends. I had a blast bowling with Sam in a tournament with his youth league on Saturday. In the middle of it all Steve's dad fell ill and was taken by ambulance to the hospital. (He's OK.) We had cake and ice cream with Steve's family for Rachel's birthday last night after dad came home, then as Steve headed back to PA for work today the kids and I visited with my brothers and their children for my youngest niece's birthday.

In the past week we have celebrated three birthdays. I never thought I'd say this, but I wouldn't care if I didn't see another birthday cake for months. Or pizza. I am so sick of pizza.

So as usual, the serenity of Sunday evening comes as a welcome change.

Looking to the week ahead, I can't wait to continue the deep-cleaning project I began in the house last week. (I know, I'll try to contain my excitement if you try to contain yours.) This also means the opportunity to do some more decluttering and getting rid of stuff. (Again with the squeals of excitement!) Sarcasm aside, I really do love seeing, feeling, and smelling a really clean house. And it's easier to maintain cleanliness once it's there. And it's much less distracting when trying to get two very-easily-distracted children ready for school in the morning.

I'm also looking forward to trying some new recipes. After feeling very uninspired when it comes to dinnertime lately, I've come across some great looking recipes I'd like to try. Mostly comfort food. Go figure. What else is there to do this time of year?

I'm sure there's more, but I am just too tired at this very moment to think of anything else.

Here's to a very productive and at least somewhat relaxing week ahead. Cheers!

Happy birthday, sweet girl.

Our baby turns eight years old this weekend. Eight!

It seems like just yesterday I heard the doctor say "It's a GIRL!" and my world changed forever. We hadn't found out the sex of the baby because we wanted to be surprised, and were we ever. I had convinced myself I was having another boy. I was fine with that. Prepared for it, even. A little brother for Sammy would be pretty cool. I imagined myself saying "the boys" when referring to our children. I grew up with two brothers and was already raising a boy of my own; I could do this.

But it was a girl. Our Rachel. And I was so ecstatic I didn't know how to react. I kept saying, "I can't believe it's a girl" every few minutes. I said it so many times one of the nurses finally asked me if that was OK. I assured her it was fabulous and that I was just so surprised. Our world of trucks and tanks and Bob The Builder suddenly exploded with pink and butterflies and ribbons and all kinds of girlie stuff. What fun!

I consider it a privilege that Steve and I have been able to love and nurture this beautiful girl from the day we knew we would be blessed with a second child. She is truly an amazing kid. She is bright and independent and sensitive and determined and full of faith. She's daddy's girl, yet I see so much of myself in her. I adore her even on the days when she has no problem telling me how much she dislikes me. I look forward to the years ahead and watching Rachel become a young woman and go out into the world and fulfill her dreams. Especially that part about going out into the world, but that's mostly on those days when she's determinedly asserting her independence.

Happy birthday, baby. We love you.