Relaxing ... and letting go.

Yesterday I had one of those days when I didn't feel very appreciated.

Oh, people all around me made me feel OK. The adults I interact with regularly were kind. Heck, even people I don't know smiled at me at the grocery store.

But my own flesh and blood? Those little people I provide dinner for every night? They were mean. They were demanding and rude and ungrateful. I couldn't do a darn thing right in their eyes.

Well, I guess that's not altogether fair of me. They did go outside with me for a while and do some yard work, and they both complimented me on the new flowerbed I worked up. But beyond that it was crankiness upon snottiness upon grumpiness.

So when bedtime came I was ruthless. No idle chatter. No last-minute showing of a new magic trick. No discussing tomorrow's schedule or grabbing a glass of water. Nope. Get in bed, here's your kiss, now be quiet.

Oh, and I still love you, ya' little brat.

Once the house was quiet I turned most of the lights off and grabbed a bottle of beer from the fridge. It was a perfect night to sit out on the steps of the front deck and listen to the frogs croaking and crickets chirping, and even a few deer rustling leaves on their way out of the woods and into the field.

I sat there in the dark in my worn out clothes and bare feet, just listening to the world around me and getting lost in the glow of the solar lights I stuck in that new flowerbed. There was a cool breeze but I was determined to stay out there until either I finished my beer or my toes got too cold.

It was heavenly. I'm pretty sure the moment I stepped outside my children jumped out of bed and sat in the doorways of their bedrooms across the hall from each other and plotted against me. I know this because when I had to step inside to answer the phone I heard a bump, thump, giggle coming from that direction. That's fine; isn't that what kids are supposed to do? It actually tickles me a little and I would have enjoyed the thought of it a whole lot more if I wasn't already annoyed with them. But I let it go anyway.

Back out on the deck I thought of how lucky I am, how blessed that when the day gets to be too much all I have to do is step outside my door and listen and let the breeze carry my troubles away.

I had to laugh a little when I remembered something my mom said over the weekend. We were shopping at a furniture store and I had two little signs in my hands - one said "Relax" and one said "Love" - and I was trying to decide whether I wanted one or the other or both. She pointed to "Love" and said, "you have that," and then pointed to "Relax" and said, "you need to figure out how to do that ... take that one."

Funny.

I took the dog outside to sit with me while I finished the last of my beer, strolled around the yard with her in the twilight, and went to bed early, a little calmer, a lot less tense.

Hmph. Who says I don't know how to relax?

Thirteen years.

Good morning! I hope all the mamas, aunties, Godmothers, caregivers (and the like) out there had a wonderful Mother's Day. I enjoyed a weekend full of surprises large and small which I meant to share with you last night until I got sidetracked doing something I was supposed to do earlier in the day. Oops. So that post got scrapped in favor of today's most important news in the Pipe Life household: it's our wedding anniversary.

Steve and I had so little time together over the weekend and we really wanted to see both our moms yesterday and we had other obligations to attend to, so we didn't get a chance to celebrate our anniversary at all. And of course today he is back to the daily grind. But rest assured, we will celebrate!

Thirteen years. Wow. Whoda thunk?

And what would an anniversary post be without a sappy tribute?

Because that's just my style. *grin*

He's a pretty awesome guy, that Steve.

And I am blessed to be able to call him mine.

A list.

Because I like lists. And I'm feeling very ADD this morning with my brain being pulled in about a bazillion different directions.

OK, maybe just 50 different directions, but that's still too many for one person, isn't it?

1. YAY for clean hot water! We had our water heater replaced yesterday. Steve and I had been discussing what to do with the water heater situation because a) ours was 11 years old and we had never done a thing with it in terms of maintenance and that was beginning to give me a very bad feeling, and b) in the midst of this conversation the hot water from every tap in the house started smelling like rotten eggs. Yeah. Not so great for showering in. Thank God we live in a part of the world where clean water - and hot water on demand - are a normal part of everyday life.

2. I am ready for this school year to be done. Kaput. In the books. Over and out.

3. We have barn swallows living in the cross posts of our clothesline. This is a bad thing in so many ways, except for this morning when I saw them dive-bombing Patch the Kitty. Funniest thing I have seen in a long time. Because Patch, of course, was doing somersaults in the air trying to catch those birds. I'm hoping I can get some of that on video before I ... ahem ... "take care of" the birds.

4. Everything is greenin' up! We don't have much of a lawn, but every day I walk around and check out the places I planted my clearance perennials last fall and most of them are popping up and looking quite healthy! My hosta plants are beginning to make an appearance, and spring wildflowers that have been creeping into the yard over the years are providing some color. This makes me very happy.

5. It's time to do our annual spring yard cleanup before people start asking if we're running a flea market.

6. Steve has been wrestling with some frustrations at work since the day he went back. I feel for him. I can't do much more than listen to him vent about it and encourage him and pray for God's guidance, so that's what I do. And I try to tell him often how much I adore and respect him for all he does for our family.

7. I can't wait for garage sale season to get started around these parts because I'm in the mood for some thrifty shopping. And can I just say? Shopping at someone else's garage sale is much more fun than managing your own. We've got a big one coming up at grandma's house and I'm wondering what I had been drinking the day I offered to take that on.

8. Rachel finished her book for the Young Authors competition this week. It's called "My Dad" and she used a bunch of family pictures in it and wrote a sweet story. It's really nice. But I'm afraid this poor girl has inherited some of her mama's perfectionism. It came out guns ablazin' when she asked me for help with the book. Eeek.

9. I want chocolate.

10. I should really try to remember to turn the thermostat down when I sleep with a bedroom window open. Especially when it's going to get down to 30 degrees outside overnight. Oops. I guess I get demerits on my frugalista card. What? I wanted to listen to the crickets.

11. Twice now in recent days I've discovered a raccoon munching away underneath my bird feeder just after dusk. I can't tell you how tempting it is to RELEASE THE HOUND! I totally would if it didn't mean I'd have to go find the hound after she treed the stupid coon. I just pray I never look out there and see a freakin' bear.

Pffft. Well that list didn't help clear my brain fog at all. Maybe I need more coffee.

Or less coffee.

Or a walk outside in the sunshine. 'cept I'll have to wear a helmet for fear of those angry birds.

Happy Cinco de Mayo, y'all. Make it a great day!

A sweet little 'before & after' in the entry.

The entryway in our house was one of the first areas I painted after we moved in. I didn't think much about the paint color beyond wanting something that a) was relatively neutral, and b) hid all the little toddler fingerprints.

A tan color called Sheepskin accomplished both, but I didn't take into account the color of the closet door and trim which ended up blending into the paint. So the entryway has always been rather blah and not at all a reflection of the cottagey style I've grown into.

But at least it hid the fingerprints.

The other issue I've had with the entryway is I've tried to corral the entry "activities" there with a chair for putting on and taking off shoes, a place to put said shoes, a place to hang/store coats, jackets, the dog leash, and drop keys and mail.

Oh, and if I could make it feel welcoming when visitors enter our home, all the better.

I think it's been a decor and functionality fail. Even my own family wouldn't use the chair; they'd grab their shoes and walk through the living room to sit on the couch and put their shoes on. Umm, HELLO??

So the entry has been my latest project. I decided to re-paint it with the lighter tan (or is it beige?) I used for the hallway and kitchen, and I've been keeping my eyes open for a small table I could tuck into a corner with a lamp and maybe a dish or basket for odds and ends.

At the same time, I've been helping my mom and aunt clear out my late grandma's house in preparation for selling it. While hauling some stuff out to the garage the other day I found this tall, slim piece of furniture stuck in a corner of the garage.

Perfect! I asked my mom if I could take it. And if I got it home and it wasn't perfect for the entryway I would make it work someplace else in the house. Five drawers! How could I pass up the opportunity for more storage?

You can probably see this piece had a hefty layer of varnish on it. What you can't see is how it smelled like moth balls.

It seriously smelled like moth balls.

I took all the drawers out and left the whole thing sitting outside in the sun all day, which took care of most of the smell.

And then I sanded it. I despise sanding with a passion, but I wanted to paint this baby and nothing was gonna' stick to that.

My paint of choice?

I have this thing for Flat White lately because I tried it on one piece of furniture and loved it. I should buy it by the case.

Anywho ... ready?

Piece of furniture: free (spiders and all ... *shudder*)
Two cans of spray paint: $7
Another can of spray paint for good measure: $3.50
5 new brassy-looking knobs:  $15 (Totally worth it.)
Total: $25.50

 *Swoon!*

I think this piece must have been part of a larger set because one side was unfinished and had holes in it like it was screwed to another piece. I don't care. And I'm going to have to take it back outside on another sunny day and let it air out a little more because there's still a hint of moth ball smell when you open the drawers. But that's OK because I love it! (The furniture, not the smell.)

We now have a place to store extra hats and mittens within the kids' reach instead of in a box on the closet shelf, which in turn frees up closet space for bulkier items like sleeping bags and whatever else needs a home.

I also love how a prettied-up piece of furniture and a lamp make this space feel like part of the rest of the house instead of a doorway to hurry through to get to someplace more comfortable.

(Yeesh. These pictures are not the best quality but you get the point, right?)

I'm still working on collecting some items for the other walls in the entryway, but this little makeover has given me some wicked cool inspiration. I love it!

A tyrant is dead.

Wow. WOW. Osama bin Laden is dead.

This is one of those moments in history when we will all likely remember where we were when we heard the news. Public Enemy No. 1, the terrorist leader the United States has been chasing for nearly a decade since the attacks on our country on 9/11/01, is finally out of the picture.

I was here at home in the midst of a conversation with friends in a Facebook group - we were all about to sign off and head to bed - when someone posted that bin Laden was dead and the U.S. had his body. I quickly flipped the television to the first channel I could find with a news feed. And there was the confirmation.

I went numb. What is a person to feel at a time like this? I was relieved. I had goose bumps. I was cautiously optimistic - this was before President Obama addressed the nation - and my mind turned to where I was Sept. 11, 2001 (at work as a newspaper reporter), my friends and relatives who have and do serve in the military and how they would react to this latest news, how life has changed for all of us over the past decade, and whether our world will look or feel different - in a symbolic way - when morning dawns.

Sleep won't come. It's hard to look away from the video coverage of celebrations in front of the White House and in Times Square. America rejoices. But I share in the conflicting feelings some have mentioned and with which the Internet is buzzing now: as a Christian, what am I to feel? How am I to react?

Opinions will differ and many of them will be offered up by way of guidance in the days ahead. Scripture will  be taken out of context and used to support all manner of reaction from celebrating the fact that justice is served to mourning the death of a human being. Me? Certainly I think we are called to pray without ceasing. Pray for our nation. Pray for our service men and women. Pray for the middle east. Pray for the dead man's soul if you can find it in your heart to do so. For even Jesus Christ prayed for those who crucified Him: Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do (Luke 23:34).

Beyond that, I can only feel what I feel and know that I, too, am a fallen child of God. I would encourage others - particularly my Christian brothers and sisters - to look inward before joining the celebration. Turn your face to God and ask yourself what He would have you do today.

Am I rejoicing that a human being was murdered? Not necessarily.

Am I sad that Osama bin Laden is dead? Not in the least.

Right or wrong, I guess I'll find out someday. And it's not for me to judge others for feeling and expressing what they are feeling right now, too.

One thing's for sure - I will crawl into my comfy bed tonight in rural western Michigan knowing I live in the greatest country on Earth, amongst millions of people proud of their nation and the men and women who protect our freedoms - including the freedom to worship as we please and to gather in the streets and peacefully celebrate or demonstrate. When I wake up (God willing) in the morning, none of that will have changed. And for that I am thankful.

God bless America.

The beginnings of something beautiful.

It was a simple thing - seed packets and small pots packaged together, never opened. Not much more than evidence of good intentions, probably picked up on a whim with no real visions of grandeur.

But to me it was something my grandma had touched. Something that made her smile when she thought of how those flowers would look, all bright and cheery in her windowsill.

Grandma never got around to planting those seeds before she died. So when my mom found them in grandma's house she asked me if I'd like them. I planted them last week and over the weekend the hollyhocks sprouted.

The hollyhocks. The seeds with the longest germination period of the three varieties I planted, and they sprouted first.

Way to keep me guessing, grandma.

The hollyhocks are the only perennials in the bunch (if I plant them outside they will come back year after year), and they are to me the epitome of granny flowers.

Here's a great picture of some mature hollyhocks from flowerspictures.org:

Don't they make you think of a granny (or grampy) with a big straw hat and a gardening trowel digging around in the dirt?

Someday maybe these guys will grow as tall and beautiful as the ones pictured above. They may not bloom until next year, but that's OK. It gives me something to look forward to.

I'm not really one for planting flowers from seed, but what the heck. If they all sprout I'll have some sweet reminders of grandma in my garden all summer long.

Change? Bring it on ... in style.

This week has been a perfect example of how bizarre our life can be sometimes, and why being flexible with our schedule is a major key to keeping a grip on sanity.

Steve left Sunday evening to head back to the hotel where he has been staying during the work week, with a 6 a.m. meeting on his schedule for Monday morning. He knew he might be assigned to the night shift for a few days this week, so he anticipated perhaps a long day Monday trying to sleep as much as possible.

Well. He was scheduled for the night shift, but that wouldn't begin until Tuesday night. So he had the latter half of Monday and most of Tuesday to kill.

In the meantime Monday, my brother-in-law and I took a road trip to pick up the Pipe Lifers' new travel trailer.

I hate admitting this - because I don't like admitting I can't do some things - but I asked Steve's brother to go with me so he could drive my truck home with the trailer attached. I don't have much experience pulling trailers (OK, no experience pulling recreational vehicles) and Steve wasn't really keen on the idea of me earning my trucker hat with our brand new 31-foot trailer.

I didn't argue.

So we got the trailer safely home and parked in the yard, the kids promptly started messing with the entertainment system, and I began a mental list of all the items I would need to round up to outfit this baby. I had visions of adding a few touches of home here and there, considering this is where Steve would be living all summer.

Then the phone rang. It was Steve. "I'm on my way home."

Awwwww. I thought he wanted to sleep in his own bed before he started that night shift business. Maybe even take advantage of the extra hours off and hang out with moi.

Umm. No. Home boy spent three hours driving on $4.16/gallon gas to whisk his new trailer off in the middle of the night, check out of the hotel, and park at the campground where he had already reserved a site.

I think he's a little excited about this thing.

He ought to be. We've been looking and shopping and keeping our eyes peeled for a new (or at least new-to-us) trailer for at least a year. Steve is in this nomadic line of work for the long haul and having a comfortable place to go "home" to after work each day makes it a little easier to live apart from the rest of the family. If that's possible. And it will certainly make it more comfortable for all of us when the kids and I visit him in the summer.

So yeah, we need to be flexible alright.

*choke*

I'm gonna be flexing my Mad Budgeting Skilz muscles for a few years. But it's all good. I am so happy to see Steve excited about this. He works his tail off for our family and I'm happy to do my part to make it a little easier for him.

Oh, and that night shift gig? Lasted all of one night. He's working during daylight hours today. Go figure.

Here's a peek at the new digs:

It has everything that is important to us right now: Steve wanted the "living space" in the rear with plenty of room to chill and watch TV or play video games; I wanted room for the kids to each have a bed and for me and Steve to have the closest thing we could get to a (private) bedroom.

He's happy. I'm happy. Sam and Rachel are happy. I can't wait to spend some time in it with all of us together.

Come on, summer!