An 'accidental' tradition.

You can always assume that when we bring our Christmas tree in the house it will be about a foot and a half too tall. So what do we do? We hack away at it from the top down. 'Cause that's how we roll.

But don't fear, it really doesn't change the look of the tree all that much. It's still all limbs and as wide as it is tall, and taking up half the living room as if it's afraid someone might forget that IT'S CHRISTMAS!

This is my view when I look left while sitting in my favorite chair:

When Steve sits in his favorite spot on the end of the couch we have to look at each other through spindly branches and around homemade ornaments. The star at the top is cardboard, made by Rachel. We used to have an angel. She might still be in another box I haven't gotten out, but I kinda' like the star.

Our tree came from family property behind our house. We haven't always gone out and cut our own tree, but a few years ago we were pretty broke at Christmastime and didn't want to (or just couldn't) spend the money to buy one, so Steve took the kids out back and found one for free.

It was so huge, so wide. It seemed ridiculous that we would bring it in the house. But we got it covered in lights and as many ornaments as those wispy branches would hold up. It was perfect.

So in the years since then the kids have asked each year when dad would take them out to pick out a tree. Even the times I have quietly mentioned how I would like a tall, thin, perfectly trimmed and sturdy-branched tree ... from a Christmas tree farm, perhaps ... the kids have poo-pooed the idea in favor of trudging out to the woods with dad to pick a very natural, homegrown evergreen.

I will admit drooling a bit over the gigantic, lush spruce that stands at the front of our church. But our tree at home - our "aggressively festive" tree, as one friend calls it - is just as beautiful.

  This year's pick (and my lumberjack husband sizing it up):

This was the first year I went with Steve and the kids to pick out the tree. It was fun - and being out there in the woods is always inspiring but particularly so when everything is covered with about a foot of snow.

We actually didn't bring the tree home on the first round. Steve's chainsaw wasn't working right, so we made mental note of where it was and went back another day.

Rach and I threw a few snowballs while Steve did the work.

It's funny how things work out. That first year Steve and the kids brought the tree in it looked so ridiculous it felt like a joke. Then the next year when the kids requested the same thing I'm sure I rolled my eyes a bit, but decided we could work with it. Now the thought of spending money on something we could get from our back yard for free seems almost silly.

Sometimes the best traditions are the unexpected ones that just happen. I like this one.

It's a hot cocoa and gift wrapping kind of day.

Baby, it's cold outside.

(Sorry. I couldn't resist.)

Worse, it's cold and wet. We have this yucky rain/snow mix going on right now, combined with high winds. So there's heavy, wet snow piling up on everything (like power lines and roads) and making a big, sloppy mess.

I was a little surprised the kids had school today considering the forecast is for this stuff to escalate and continue through the rest of today and tomorrow. Lemme tell ya', it was a harrowing ride to school this morning and I am not looking forward to going back out to get the little rascals this afternoon. But I'm confident we'll be fine, and maybe they will get to start their Christmas break early if school is called off tomorrow.

Good news! Sam's leg healed beautifully and he got his cast taken off Monday. Praise Jesus. There was no dancing a jig or anything like that, though. He's still using one crutch to help him get around because his leg is a bit weak from not being used. The doctor said he needs to be able to walk for 45 minutes without stopping and with no pain before he starts running and jumping (or snowboarding). I'm glad he can work on recovering during Christmas break.

Sucky news! While we were in The Big City for Sam's appointment my truck broke down. Fortunately it was after the appointment, but that just meant we sat in the parking lot at a Steak-N-Shake waiting for a wrecker. Long story short: it was the alternator (which just the day before I had talked to my father-in-law about replacing) and we were able to have it fixed at Pep Boys. We were home by 8:30-ish, so not too bad. Except that I was then a little lighter in the wallet. A week before Christmas. Boo.

But good news! My shopping was almost done anyway. And I finished it yesterday! So I'm doing a little wrapping today. I'm one of those people who actually likes this part.

I'm getting excited. Steve will leave Colorado on Saturday to be home Sunday night. Hopefully the storm calms down by then and he doesn't run into any trouble on his drive. I'm looking forward to having him here and just hanging out as a family. Often Steve is off work this time of year because jobs get shut down for winter. This is the first time I remember him being so far away so close to Christmas, and it'll be four weeks since I've seen him. So yeah, I'll be happy to have him home. We have nothing on our social calendar, and that's fine with me.

Bring it.

Yesterday it was so warm outside I had windows open in the house.

On December 4. In Michigan.

This morning? Not so much.

We keep getting teased with a little snow here and there, but it melts within a day or two. Up until now I've enjoyed what we got but I was only marginally ready for a big snowfall. Rachel helped me do the last of the tidying-up outside last night though, so now I'm ready for the fluffy white stuff to start piling up and to stick around.

Except I'm not. Because Sam is still on crutches and I worry that he will slip and fall. He has just shy of two weeks before he goes back to the doctor to have his cast taken off. And then I'll be ready. Maybe. Because as soon as the snow starts to pile up and Sam has the OK from the doctor, he's going to start bugging me to hit the slopes. Hhhhh.

Praise God for healthy, active children, right?

I really am ready for some snow. I actually saw some dandelions in the yard yesterday while I was out playing with the dogs. For serious! All this grey and blah out there and then I see these BRIGHT YELLOW flowers poking their heads up. Tough little suckers. I hope they enjoy the snow, too. Ha!

But seriously. Christmas is 20 days away and I would really love a white Christmas. Every day I play my Pandora "White Christmas" station while I putter around the house, and I leave the lights glowing on our teensy little tree.

That tree, by the way, looked like a hot mess this morning. We have had some close calls with the dogs bumping into the table - or the domino effect of chair, then table, and the tree goes a wobblin' - but so far she's still standing. Gunnar can get his nose pretty high, though, so he can slide stuff right off tables, countertops ... basically any surface where you've put something to keep it away from him.

Exhibit A:

 Our makeshift tablecloth-turned-tree-skirt.

Gunnar grabbed one little corner with his mouth, apparently thinking the tree wanted to play a game of tug with him.

I caught it before the whole thing came tumbling down.

Exhibit B:

 Stockings will not be hung until Mr. Gunnar is safely crated in the bedroom on Christmas Eve.

Aww. Despite his daily shenanigans, there is the occasional Christmas card-worthy photo. How could anyone not love this face?

He's ready for snow, too.

Procrastination is biting me in the butt.

We have more fresh snow this morning. It was a pleasant surprise, I can't lie. But it was just a fluffy inch or so ... not enough to hide all the stuff on the patio I haven't put away yet.

I do this every. stinkin. year.

I did at least get the lawn mowed one last time before the weather turned really cold, so our front yard doesn't look like the snow fell on a hay field. But I still have patio furniture and flower pots scattered hither and yon. At least most of them are empty - I did get around to doing that. But every time I walk in or out the front door I am reminded of these half-done projects and it grinds on my nerves. I don't know why I let it bother me so much; it's my own darn fault. I need to use that annoyance as motivation to get it done, though. It looks like temps will be a little warmer this weekend so maybe I'll ask Rachel to bundle up and help me.

One thing I have not been procrastinating on is my Christmas shopping. I'm feeling pretty good about having checked some items off my list, and even got a few of them wrapped today. I've got some Christmas tunes playing and I'm about to pull out some decorations. The more I think about it though, the more I am convinced we should keep the decor very simple this year with the puppy still "exploring" everything/everywhere with his mouth. Gunnar was just at the vet on Monday and he weighed in at 66 pounds. He's five months old and he's huge. His tail alone could take down an 8-foot Christmas tree. So we're going small, fake and on top of a table with the tree, and we'll make it as fabulous as we can. If I have a tree all lit up and my nativity scene set out I'll be happy. I'm really looking forward to doing some crafts and baking and watching Christmas movies with the kids leading up to their holiday break from school. And hopefully Steve will have a nice long break from work over the holidays, too.

My goal is to have a relaxing and enjoyable Christmas season ... starting now!

Clean Slate Sunday: 11.25.12 edition

Here we are at the cusp of a new week.

I'm in my jammies, ready to stretch out in my big bed, a little sad that I'll be alone.

Steve is safely back in Colorado.

The kids are tucked in.

It was a lovely long weekend, but Steve and I agreed we are both ready to get back to our everyday routines. It's a crazy life, but it's what we're used to. And I am ready to get some Christmas boxes out of the closet and start decorating. We got a little snow last night and it stuck around today, which really gets me into the holiday spirit.

That, and having walked around in Sam's Club today after I dropped Steve off at the airport. It's like Christmas in overdrive in that place. Which isn't so bad, if you can look beyond the consumerism and just enjoy the colors and sounds and smiles, which I did.

Thirty days until Christmas!

Here's to a wonderful week ahead.

Blessings galore.

The week of Thanksgiving has come and gone, more or less, and I am left with this feeling of contentedness that has me looking forward to pulling out the Christmas decorations and turning on some holiday music.

These past few days have been busy, but relaxing. Wednesday afternoon I picked Steve up at the airport when he flew in from Colorado for the weekend. We went out for dinner before heading home, something we don't get a chance to do very often, just the two of us. We visited friends for their daughter's birthday party Wednesday evening, we enjoyed a low-key dinner with Steve's family for Thanksgiving, and have pretty much chilled out, slept in, ate leftovers, watched football and movies, the guys have gone hunting, and we've enjoyed some great family time. And it snowed! It didn't stick around, but I enjoyed it while it lasted.

I am not a hardcore Black Friday (or Thursday) shopper, but I did make two trips to town on Thanksgiving day - one in the morning and a spur-of-the-moment one at night - to snag a couple of items I've been wanting that were on great sales. The morning at Meijer was a piece of cake. The trip to Wal-mart in the evening was insanity, but my shopping buddy (my future-sister-in-law) and I had a blast chatting people up and joking around while we stood in line. And I have to say, maybe it's because we live in a relatively small town and people here are generally pretty tolerant, but for the most part everyone we encountered was in good spirits and very helpful. Customers and employees alike were kind and courteous, and the few grumblers were the exception. Sue and I agreed it was worth the trip and the wait to have gotten the TV's we went for, and I was happy to have also been able to knock a few other gifts off my list.

Gift shopping aside, we have so much for which to be thankful, this year and always. I can't help but reflect a little on years past and the ups and downs we've been through and feel overwhelming gratitude for where we are now.

Steve heads back to work in Colorado tomorrow afternoon. The kids head back to school Monday for a few full weeks leading up to Christmas, which is probably when we'll see Steve again. In between I plan to decorate the house, finish the Christmas shopping, enjoy the quiet time during the days, and do my best to relax. I love this time of year. I look forward to our little family of four being together again ... that'll be the best gift ever.

Post Christmas lull ... and good news!

Two days after Christmas and it still kinda' looks like Santa's elves had a party up in here. And I am just now starting to feel like the cookies and candies and cheese and crackers and all that good stuff is beginning to wear off.

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas. We sure did. It was quiet - on Christmas Eve we made our annual cookie deliveries to neighbors/friends, then went to the candlelight service at church, then hung out at my in-laws' and did our gift exchange with them. Christmas morning the kids slept until a little after 7:30 (a Christmas miracle!) and then the four of us opened gifts and spent the rest of the day just enjoying each other's company. Sam was so happy with his new ski goggles and helmet that he wore them around the house most of the day, thoroughly cracking me up.

More than ever before, I just can't express how happy I am to be surrounded by family and friends this year. We have been blessed beyond measure.

It's been so nice to laze around and do a whole lot of nothing these last few days, but I'm feeling the pull to get back into a routine and get the house cleaned up and all the baubles put away. Just in time, I suppose, as Steve got the call today that he's been waiting for: he's starting a new job next week. Praise God. And that's all I'm gonna' say about that for now.

In other news, for the first time in ... shoot, maybe ever ... Steve and I have plans to go out on New Year's Eve! Neither of us is really into large gatherings of people, but we're going to brave it for one night to go out with another couple to dinner and then to our little town's version of a NYE ball drop. It will be nice to do something with just the adults, and I imagine this will be a bit of an early celebration for Steve's birthday (which is January 6th and by that time he'll be in Pennsylvania working).

I'm looking forward to 2012. This year has been a great year in many ways for our family, but I'm ready to leave some of the struggles behind, take what we've learned from them, and put some positive energy into making the year ahead even better than this one.

Quiet time.

It is rare for me to be awake before everyone else. And in this house there is really nowhere to go that I don't run the risk of disturbing others' slumber, so I tiptoe around, sort some laundry, feed the cats, and pray I get just a few more minutes of the peace I so enjoy.

I am more of a night owl than an early riser, but I do so appreciate these mornings when I wake earlier than usual, and with a sense of purpose. A friend said the other day, "God woke me up early to spend some time with Him." That's how I feel this morning.

Often around this time of year - despite my promises to myself that I won't - I get a bit frazzled and caught up in the busy-ness of the holiday, and while I never forget the reason we are celebrating, I do sometimes lose my focus for a bit. It's never long before I hear that voice in my head telling me to still myself, calm down, take a breather. So I do just that in the early morning hours: I steady myself. I sit in the dark and stare at the glow of the lights on the Christmas tree. I count my blessings and give thanks. Or sometimes I just sit. And do nothing. Which is harder than it sounds.

I hope that in these last few days leading up to Christmas you are able to take some quiet time, too. Reflect on the gifts God has given you. Give thanks for your family, friends, home, health, job ... whatever is meaningful to you. And move about your day with a sense of peace.


Photo

Shopping day!

I have been too busy to post this week, but don't cry for me Blogland because busy is a good thing. My daylight hours have been filled with gift wrapping and baby sitting and a load of laundry here and there ...

Wait. No. No laundry. I think I might have made dinner the other night, though.

No worries. Steve has been filling in those gaps splendidly. He is particularly a great cook which is half the reason I married him. Ha!

So today I have nothing scheduled which means I need to make the most of my last day sans children. And that means shopping. I'd rather wrap 100 more gifts. (And people, that's saying a lot because I have wrapped just shy of three billion gifts this week.)

But wait. Most of what I buy today will need to be wrapped. Drat.

After today the kids will be home for the holidays and we'll be baking cookies and playing games and watching It's A Wonderful Life and if you believe it will be all fun and games I have a bridge somewhere in the desert to sell you.

No playing in the snow, even. 'Cause there is none. I've put in a request for a white Christmas, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed. We live in Michigan, it's not too much to ask really.

Snow or no, we're gonna' do our best to enjoy the next couple of weeks together. Let's hope a vacation from school means the kids will sleep in. I can dream, can't I?

Have a great Friday, everyone! Nine days 'til Christmas!

Like a kid on Christmas morning.

I had trouble sleeping last night. Too much caffeine, maybe. Full moon shining through the skylights, maybe. But mostly because my mind was racing with excitement. I had spent a couple hours few minutes on Pinterest (hellooo, time suck) (proof: I just opened up the page to copy and link the address and spent 5 minutes there. Psh.) looking at all kinds of ideas for little baking projects and fun crafts to do with the kids while they are off for Christmas break. They are done with school after next Friday which leaves several days before Christmas to keep them busy.

I found some neat recipes for edible "gifts in a jar" and easy chocolate-dipped whatever-you-can-think-of with lots of little goodies sprinkled over them. Sam and Rachel both enjoy spending time in the kitchen, so I'm really looking forward to it. So ... if you stop by our house around Christmas this year you'll definitely get your sugar buzz for the day. Zing!

Leading up to vacation time, I've been working on cleaning and decorating the house for the holidays. We don't have a whole lot of storage space for holiday-specific decor, so I'm getting creative and using things we already have combined with everyday items. For some reason it feels like this year I'm a little more relaxed about getting all this stuff done, and that's kinda' nice. But apparently I can be relaxed and abuzz at the same time because as soon as I crawl into bed at night my mind goes crazy with all kinds of ideas to try the next day. I might get brave and post some pictures of our decor in the next few days.

Beyond that, last night I tossed and turned with excitement about a new prospect I'm finally moving on. For a few years I've been considering creating a gift-wrapping business for folks who don't have the time, don't enjoy, or just plain stink at wrapping gifts. It's something I really enjoy doing, so even if I don't charge a bundle I'll be coming out ahead ... and making a little spending money. A couple of friends have taken me up on the offer and this morning I picked up the first round of gifts I will wrap and then deliver back. I'm excited about getting started.

And maybe something in me knew today would be ... different. We've had a rough go of things these last couple of months and while our family is blessed in so many ways, Christmas gift giving would be tight this year. I had made peace with that. It's not about the gift giving anyway, right? But today we received some unexpected "contributions" to the Christmas budget. Gifts that will allow us to do a little more for our kids than we would have been able to otherwise.

What can I say? I am humbled. Thankful. Fortunate enough to live in a community and have family and friends who will rally to help others who need it. I know this because many times we have been on the giving end. The receiving end is decidedly less comfortable, but no less touching or heart-warming. And the kindness of others is not taken lightly in this house; I believe blessings will be showered upon those who give so generously.

That's certainly been the case for us.

Savoring small joys.

Yesterday I had every intention of writing a post, but I opened my laptop and then just sat here staring at the screen. For a long time.

I'm fighting this emotional funk that threatens to suck the happy and content right out of me ... and I'm employing every resource I have to keep it at bay. Christmas music playing, our colorfully-lit tree glowing, cinnamon-scented candles burning, a mug of something yummy in my hand (great coffee, special hot chocolate, or a fizzy Diet Dr. Pepper, depending on the time of day), household tasks - the few things in life I can control - under way. I've been using a lot of this quiet time during the day to have some pretty deep conversations with God, too. And it still seems like more work than it should be.

Part of it is just my body's chemical makeup, and I know that. When the skies are grey and gloomy like they were yesterday my mood often matches it. Proof: today the sun is shining brightly and I'm much more active than I was yesterday when I loafed around most of the day and went to bed early.

We can't control the sun. Sometimes we can't control our circumstances. But I strongly believe that most of the time we can control our own attitude, which some days can make things a little brighter.

It can be the smallest thing that makes a difference. Yesterday, despite feeling like there was a black cloud hanging over me, I had a few moments of sheer joy which I so appreciated. One of them was enjoying the scent of freshly laundered clothes - MY clothes. The smell made me happy. The stack of clothes reminded me that even though I have a limited wardrobe these days, I still have choices. Another of those moments was wrapping a gift for a friend's birthday. It's nothing big - something I saw during my travels over the summer that reminded me of her - but I found some pretty paper and pulled out my scrapbooking supplies to make it a cute little package. It was fun. I got some creative juices flowing and it felt good to complete a task, even one so small. I've learned to savor those moments.

I have a feeling it will be my task in the weeks ahead to have more good days than not-so-good days. It might require some effort and a lot more hot chocolate, but it will all be worth it.

Now I think the sunshine is calling my name. We have precious few of these beautiful days left before the snow comes back with a vengeance, so I'm headed out to enjoy this one.

Clean Slate Sunday: 11.27.11 edition

We've had a nice weekend, but I am ready for the kids to go back to school and for all of us to get back to our routines. I have a tendency to extend "holiday" mode and continue to eat more than I should and resist getting back into the daily grind of laundry and tidying up around the house and whatever else needs to be done.

So it's time to ditch the last of the pumpkin pie and start working off all those mashed potatoes and gravy. *ahem* Starting tomorrow morning.

I have a lot on my mind tonight and I'm trying to sort through it all. It is part of my nature to want to figure out the whys and hows and to fit the puzzle pieces together, but I also know that's not necessarily what I am meant to do. So I struggle during moments when my son, now officially a teenager, flexes those "I wanna be independent" muscles, and I thank God my husband is here to put him in his place.

But I can't forget the fact that Steve is here only because he is unemployed right now ... with Christmas just a few weeks away. And then there is our concern for his dad, back in the hospital after having trouble breathing ... they're working on dissolving blood clots in his lungs and he will hopefully be home later this week ... this latest bump in the road yet another reminder that his condition is rather fragile. And that's just not something you want to think about someone you love.

I've been thinking about my grandma a lot lately, too. Last year at this time she spent Thanksgiving with us, the first time she hadn't been in Florida for the holiday in decades. She would also spend Christmas with us, and see snow - again, for the first time in years - and welcome the new year, and then her health worsened and by February she was gone. I miss her dearly. I miss her more than I can even express.

Rachel and I put up a small Christmas tree this weekend - one I had found at a thrift store and thought would be perfect for all the kids' homemade ornaments and 1st, 2nd, 3rd Christmas ornaments, etc. It's in a corner of our living room and as I look at the glowing lights tonight it reminds me of how happy I was to have grandma here with us. In fact, last Christmas was one of the happiest I can remember.

It has been a weekend of giving thanks, and we certainly have plenty to be thankful for. At the same time, I look forward to celebrating even more in the coming weeks. I am confident there are big things in store for the Pipe Lifers, and when we look back at this Christmas season we will all remember it as one of our best.

Today is the first Sunday of Advent, the season of waiting that leads up to Christmas and the celebration of the birth of Jesus Christ. Today our pastor told the children in the children's sermon it is a season of hope and anticipation.

Hope and anticipation. I'm hanging onto those words. I'm looking forward to the next few weeks. And I'm looking forward to a celebration of grand proportions.

Feeling festive?

Is it too soon to be thinking about Christmas decorations?

Steve would say YES.

When I was in stores and saw Halloween candy on clearance on one side of me and Christmas stuff going up on the other side, I would have said YES.

But now that Thanksgiving is just around the corner I'm starting to get that itch to pull out the boxes.

I don't go crazy with Christmas decor, but I do like our home to look and feel festive. I have friends who decorate a tree for every room of their home - and those trees are absolutely gorgeous - but you will not see my house in the pages of Better Homes and Gardens anytime soon. Or ever.

Alas, we have our own brand of decorating style. It's cheap. It involves many hand-me-down and homemade ornaments and, at least the last two years, a tree plucked from the nearby forest. The first year we did this - too broke to go buy a tree - a friend tagged the monstrosity Steve brought home "aggressively festive." It took up half our living room.

Funny how they always look so much smaller ... until you get them in the house.

But she was beautiful, wasn't she? Every lopsided branch of 'er.

As it turned out, we all loved that tree. I discovered my children didn't give one wit about whether they had a perfect tree. They had only two requests: that we actually decorate a tree before Christmas Day (admittedly sometimes a struggle), and that the tree be real. In fact, they are so adamant about having a real tree that when I brought home a small, pre-lit tree I found for $5 at a thrift store recently, the first thing they both asked was, "Is this going to be our only tree?!?" I assured them it would not be.

The joy of an artificial tree, though, is that I can set it up and fluff it and decorate it at my leisure. I don't know yet where this new one will go, but I'm pretty sure I will be getting it out soon to satisfy that itch to start decorating. I would like to try my hand at a themed tree. What theme? I have no idea.

Wait. Is "aggressively festive" a theme?

Enjoying the Christmas afterglow.

I have been so happy to have my family together for Christmas. This is what I've been needing, the missing link. I'm pretty good (at least I think so) at getting by when Steve's not here, but I miss him so much when he's gone and it's difficult to get into a celebratory mood without my favorite person here to share it with.

But right now? While he's here with me and our children? Bliss.

We've had fun as a family these last few days and I look forward to another week of sleeping in, watching movies, playing games, baking, eating dinners together, and maybe even a little shopping. As I write, Steve and the kids are out rounding up what they need to do a little skeet shooting. I'm so glad they are able to spend some quality time with their daddy, too.

We had a very simple Christmas this year. It was different for us. Steve's mom is away visiting her family until after the first of the year, and so our annual Christmas Eve gathering at mom and dad's house became a gathering at our house. We opened a few gifts, ate a bunch of snacks, and toasted with champagne. It was nice and relaxing.

Christmas Day was quiet, too. When we couldn't hold Rachel off any longer - about 6:30 - we finally got up and Steve put the breakfast casserole in the oven to bake while we opened gifts. The kids were happy with what they received, and I was happy watching the looks on their faces when Steve and I opened the gifts they helped us pick out for each other. We got Steve a new Gerber multi-tool and a new belt. They got me - God bless all three of them - a Keurig one-cup coffee brewer. I have been eyeballing them for months, but it's one of those things that I just couldn't justify buying for myself. I'm in heaven!

Now that all the scraps of wrapping paper have been taken out with the trash and grandma's Nuts & Bolts snack mix has been safely hidden away for munching on later, it's time to sort some laundry and empty the dishwasher (again). I enjoy these days following Christmas, though, as much as I enjoy the days leading up to it. Every time I turn around there is a reminder of Sam's and Rachel's thoughtfulness, my husband's presence, our blessed life. Barring the days following the births of our children, I can't think of a time when I was happier than I am today. I'd like to bottle this feeling, but since that's not possible I'll just bask in it ... enjoy it ... soak it up.

'Twas two nights before ...

It's 2 a.m. and I can't sleep.

It's not that panicked oh my gosh we'll never get it all done and Christmas will be ruined kind of can't sleep. It's more of a dang, we still have a lot to do in the next 20 hours kind of can't sleep.

I woke up remembering that I hadn't gotten out the recipe for our Christmas morning breakfast casserole, hence the needed ingredients had not been added to the shopping list.

Oh yes, there is still shopping to do. Food shopping AND gift shopping. The majority of both, actually.

We're not crazy. Life has just been a little off lately. Between budget-sapping vehicle repairs and energy-sapping coughs and colds and my own emotional unrest concerning my aging grandmother, we've had some hurdles to jump over before we could get down to the business of preparing for Christmas.

The joy of Christmas, though, is it will come whether we have a tree or not (we do now, and we will decorate it tomorrow ... er, later today). Christmas will be here and we will celebrate Christ's birth whether we find two gifts for each child or 10 gifts, and whether we wrap them or not (ask me tomorrow morning at 2 a.m.).

We may think we can't find the time in our day for it, but Christmas will come, our world will be blessed, we will be forgiven and find salvation, and there will be peace. There's some comfort in knowing that while we busy ourselves with earthly things and expectations and sail along through our daily lives, God is preparing to wow us like He promised He would. Even if we become distracted from the true meaning of all of this, He most certainly does not.

Just this evening there were a few moments with my family that made me forget about all the Christmas preparations yet undone and gave me that little poke I needed to get things back in focus.

We had just returned from our second trip to town after racing back there to pick up my truck from the shop where we thought it had been repaired after being towed in by a wrecker. I was more than a little frustrated because the "repair" didn't quite repair things, and here we were at the end of the work day with a long holiday weekend ahead. Steve had picked up KFC for dinner so at least nobody had to cook. There was this moment when everybody stood in the kitchen filling their plates, then one by one we sat down at the dining room table together. There was no "hey guys, let's all sit down here" and certainly we could have migrated to the living room and plopped down in front of the television. But there we sat together as a family, making our game plan for the Christmas Eve shopping jaunt and watching the candles of our Advent wreath flicker.

Then we laughed together - once we got over the initial shock - as Patch The Kitty got up close and personal with the Christmas tree by climbing the trunk. Hellooooo, Griswolds.

And then after dinner everyone helped clean up and we started our annual cookie-baking extravaganza. A few years ago we started a tradition of passing out cookies (wicked good double chocolate peanut butter thumbprint cookies) to several neighbors on Christmas Eve. I love doing this as a family, and making these cookies only once a year gets everyone excited in anticipation. These are seriously good cookies. And we had a seriously good time as we worked assembly-line-style with Rachel and me mixing ingredients, Sam melting chocolate, and Steve supervising from the sidelines while sipping eggnog.

Kidding! Steve helped, too.

After all that, it was nice to chill out and watch a few minutes of TV with Steve, then settle in for a good rest. I set the alarm for early in the morning (but NOT 2 o'clock!) determined I would have a few minutes to enjoy a cup of coffee and a little reflection before starting the mad rush of the day.

I guess the universe had other plans for me.

At least I got some of the aftermath of the baking spree cleaned up. And I found the recipe for the Christmas morning casserole.

I should head back to bed and try to sleep, but I rather enjoy the peace and quiet of the house at this hour. I have a feeling it won't be this quiet again for a few days, and that's as it should be - we have so much to celebrate.

Merry Christmas.

What is wrooooong with me??

I've got the music playing.

Pretty poinsettias decorating the house.

Fresh fluffy snow outside.

Yummy candles burning.

Christmas cards arriving in the mail every day.

Even peppermint-scented soap in the bathroom.

Where the heck is my Christmas spirit?!?

OK, to say I don't have any Christmas spirit probably isn't accurate. I do enjoy the sights and sounds of the season and the anticipation of celebrating Christ's birth with friends and family. It's not like I've got a case of the Bah-humbugs. I'm just not as excited as I usually am 10 days before Christmas.

Today I sorted through the few little gifts I have for the kids in hopes that it would inspire me to list the things I still want to get for them and devise a plan of action.

Nope.

Maybe it's because we don't have a Christmas tree yet. But I kinda want to wait until Steve is home so we can all go pick one out together.

*sigh*

Maybe I need some caffeine.

Maybe I should take a cue from the animals. Look, they seem to have set aside their differences for the holidays and they don't give a rip what's happening in the world outside:

I have never, ever had any combination of cats and dogs that would curl up together like this.

Aww. I will declare this our own little Christmas miracle!

Here's hoping the excitement filters in over the next few days ...

Moving Day.

We sprung granny from the nursing home yesterday. And just in time, because I think she was about to go postal on her roommate who liked to leave her lights and her television on all. night. long.

The medical care facility is a wonderful place for folks who need round-the-clock care. God blessed those nurses and aides and cooks and maintenance people with hearts as big as the sun, I think, and a whopping load of patience on the side. But grandma can do a lot for herself and really just needs someone to be there for some specific things - to keep track of her medications, to help steady her sometimes, to make sure she eats properly.  So rather than keep her in a busy, noisy medical care facility, we moved grandma to a quieter, homier setting in an adult foster care home.

The kids had the day off school yesterday due to the weather, so I asked Rachel to come along with me to help move grandma.

If there was ever a time I wished I could have snapped my fingers and had everything done in an instant, it would have been yesterday. I was not prepared for how physically and emotionally taxing the day would be, and I wasn't even the one moving! It just seems like every time I see grandma, which is at least a couple times a week, I don't even realize that my body tenses up until our visit is over and I'm about halfway home and I start to ache. I don't know why I get so tense but it's probably because I get nervous about grandma falling when I take her out, and it's hard to relax when I'm always on high alert ready to jump when she says she needs something.

Plus yesterday it was ridiculously cold and windy and a lousy day to move, even if all we were moving was two big boxes and two plastic bags and a Christmas cactus.

As far as the emotions of it all, I just had a hard time leaving her at her new home. Grandma seemed happy and excited about the independence she'd have now. But it's still not home, and I didn't want her to be lonely. On top of that, with her independence comes more responsibility for our family to make sure grandma's prescriptions are filled and doctor appointments are met and any of her other needs outside of what the AFC home provides are taken care of. That's fine, and how it should be, but I'm used to my parents taking care of all that so it's all new to me.

I don't want to fail her. Or my parents.

Nor do I want to let my own home and my relationships with Steve and our children fall into disarray because I've gotten so busy running around meeting others' needs. So I'm trying to carve out time for everybody. I took a couple nights to go visit Steve late last week for some much-needed mommy and daddy time. In the evenings I've been trying to read with Rachel or sit and watch TV and chat with Sam. And I've been trying - key word trying - to drag myself to bed at a decent hour at night so I can at least face every new day rested, even if I don't know what the day holds.

Sometime over the next week I'll have to find a few hours to do some Christmas shopping, and then wrap those gifts, and maybe even put up a Christmas tree. Because ya' know what? The holidays are coming whether I think I have the time or not.

Pretty quiet on the homefront.

Our little Advent wreath on the dining room table is one of very few signs of Christmas around here. Life has been busy but no busier than usual, Rachel and I have been sick, and frankly I've been just too flippin' tired to do much more than the absolute basics.

I keep waiting for that burst of energy that comes after you've been under the weather for a few days, but I'm afraid the illness hasn't quite run its course yet. I sure hope it passes soon because the house is a mess and I want to do some cleaning up and making things nice and cozy.

It's looking like our plans to go to Texas over Christmas break won't be happening this year. Steve's work schedule just won't allow enough time to make the trip. We're all a little bummed, but the eternal optimist in me says we'll have a good opportunity to build up our reserves while Steve is working an insane amount of hours. Make hay while the sun shines and all that ... because we know how quickly things can turn around.

We've been getting lots of snow this week. Being near - but not too near - the Lake Michigan shore provides some interesting mixtures of weather. My friends right on the shore have just a few inches of snow while we, about 30 miles east, have about a foot of the fluffy white stuff. Sam and Rachel are going to make a killing getting paid for shoveling our deck if this keeps up.

Christmas countdown: 17 days!

Christmas is coming.

There's no denying it. Christmas will be here in 24 days.

The trouble is, I'm not sure where the Pipe Lifers will be in 24 days. We are considering taking a vacation to see Steve's extended family in South Texas while the kids are on break from school, but the only way we can do that is if Steve has a good chunk of time off work. He may not know whether he'll have any time off until the last minute (that's what happened at Thanksgiving - time off, then no time off, then yay! a long weekend after all).

I'm not concerned about whether we take the trip. Steve and I have decided on a minimum budget we'll need to make it happen and we both feel it's time for all of us to go and see his family - including several aunts and uncles, cousins, and his grandmother - so if we can make it work, we will.

My hesitation is what to do about everything else leading up to Christmas. It's snowing this morning! And that gets me excited to do something ... Christmasy. But we might not be here to enjoy all the Christmas stuff at Christmas time, so I'm not sure I want to expend the effort.

Do I decorate like I normally would? Do we get a tree? We always get a live tree. Should I set up my nativity scene? What about the cookies we bake as a family and take around the neighborhood on Christmas Eve? We wouldn't be here for that if we go to Texas, and that's a tradition I have really enjoyed the last few years.

Not only have I not hauled out any decorations, but because of our plans being a bit up in the air I haven't done any shopping for gifts. NONE.

I'm in Limbo Land and I don't like it here! I'm a girl who needs a plan. And I can't possibly hang out here for the next three weeks without some holiday something-or-other going on.

That's it. I'm going to take advantage of the good mood the snowfall puts me in and do something. I'm not sure what yet, but I have a half a cup of hot cocoa to help me figure it out.

Enjoy your day!


Oh! P.S. ...  lots of excitement planned around here tomorrow ... perhaps to be considered an early Christmas present? Hmmm. Stay tuned!