Sadness the way it should be: followed by laughter.

Bad news. I found our missing kitty.

Dead on the side of the road.

*sigh*

I was afraid of that.

But like I posted yesterday, we always kinda' know we take a chance with letting our cats outside. When I gave Sam and Rachel the news they took it better than I thought they would. Actually they didn't react much at all. Perhaps they had it in their minds as a possibility since Snowbell had been gone for three days already.

I told the kids I was sorry. Sorry that the story didn't have a happy ending. Sorry that life isn't fair sometimes. Sorry that our goofy, cuddly, beautiful Snowbell is gone.

I don't know what I expected. A moment of silence, maybe? A group hug? Someone to at least say, "He was a good cat?"

What I got was, "Hey, can we get two pets to replace him?" with a reminder that we never did replace the dead goldfish.

The goldfish Snowbell ate - and then puked up on the rug - while we were on vacation a few years ago.

I was processing the pet question when Sam started to chuckle.

"Well I guess he kinda' deserved that for eating the fish," he said.

Oh my. Did my son just say that karma killed the cat? Because it sounded like he just said karma killed the cat.

Now that right there is funny.

Morbid, maybe. But funny. We laughed ourselves silly.

MIA

We have two cats. I haven't seen this one for about three days:

Snowbell is the mouthiest, but lovingest cat I have ever known. I think he thinks he's a dog; he'll greet you at the door, follow you around the house (I can't tell you how many times I've tripped over him as he tried to run ahead of me), and let you know when his food dish is anywhere near empty.

The cats come and go as they please. They have been spayed and neutered, so we're not concerned about adding to the kitty population, but out here in the country they have the potential to encounter any number of wild animals and who knows what else while they're outside. I suppose it's a risk we take, knowing full well that every time we open the door for them they might never come back. Especially Snowbell, because he likes to be outside at night. He's a great mouser.

Oh, dear.

Think good thoughts for him, will ya'?

Ack! I just gotta' say it: nobody's perfect!

I appreciate a quiet Sunday afternoon when I can catch up on some of the blogs I follow, hoping to spark some creativity, see what friends and fellow writers have been up to, or sometimes just get lost in someone else's world for a while.

Inevitably I click from a blog I know and love to one on their reading list that looks interesting, and so on and so on. What a fun way to work my way around the world from the comfort of my own home!

But occasionally my journey into other's lives causes me to log off and smack my laptop shut in exasperation. I see perfectly-lit pictures of beautiful, clean homes and happy, organically-fed children, and I read about how they fill each day with fun and educational activities. It's all about love and hugs and rainbows and fuzzy little kittens.

WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?!? Nobody's life could possibly be that perfect.

My name is Jane. I school my children at home and I feed them only foods we grow in our back yard, sans chemicals. I support baby-wearing and I abhor spanking. My husband is a genius and an entrepreneur. We never speak a harsh word to each other in any of the three languages in which we are fluent. We don't own a television. We have no debt. Our children don't know who Hannah Montana is. We make our own furniture and milk our own cow. Look at my beautiful home!

Seriously? Hhhhhhh.

There was a time when I would have been a little jealous of Jane's seemingly wonderful life and might have even tried to be more like her - the her in the snapshot she posted on-line, anyway. Now I just sorta' lift an eyebrow. Just a little. I don't judge Jane, but neither do I assume that her children have never thrown temper tantrums, her husband loves his job, Jane lives caffeine-free, and she has never been embarrassed by the state of her home when company stops by unexpectedly.

If her life really is that way? Well. Then more power to her. It sounds exhausting.

The fun thing about blogging (and the Internet in general) is that we can present only the aspects of our lives we wish to share. We can stage our photos. We can skip blogging on our crappiest days and write twice as much about the best days. We can make our lives look as perfect as possible. Or we can use our space in the blogosphere as a place to dump all the drama and share all the frustrations of life. I try to land somewhere in the middle.

I use this blog as a sort of journal and even though I haven't been at it very long I look back on my previous posts and remember the good days, bad days, ugly days, and yes, even the seemingly perfect days. My life is about striving for ... I don't know ... goodness. Peace. My family's happiness. But it gets messy sometimes, and I'm OK with you seeing that because messiness keeps me humble. Messiness is real.

My friend B is forever reminding me, "progress, not perfection." Pretty good words to live by.

I can't help but think some people spend so much time polishing the facade that they forget to live the life, and that's a shame.

That's all. I just had to get that off my chest. I feel better now.

Oh, and chances are if you are reading this, my imaginary character Jane does not represent you. Jane is all those people whose real names I don't know but whose perfect photos and children and spouses and homes are just too sugary sweet for my taste.

Now I'm really done. Off my soap box. Carry on!

And for heaven's sake, enjoy the journey. It can be imperfect and beautiful at the same time.

Hello, kitty.

Comfy?

Mhmm. I thought so.

I applied for a job.

But that was three weeks ago and since I haven't heard anything I'm assuming I am not being considered for it.

And that's OK.

In fact, I'm kinda' glad. Because if nobody offers me a job I don't have to make the decision of whether I should accept it.

It seemed like good timing. A friend passed along the job posting when Steve was between jobs and I was doing my best not to freak out about the future. "Why not apply?" I thought. I really enjoy being a stay-at-home mom, but if it comes down to needing to support our family, of course I would look for a job. And if all turned out fine with Steve's work status (which it did) and I was offered a job, too, I might still consider it. Who couldn't use a little extra income these days?

Then I started to think about having to buy a whole new professional wardrobe again. And figuring out what to do with the kids after school. And commuting to work. And the inevitability of office politics. And how we'd have to leave the dog inside all day because she's a wuss in the snow. And the list went on.

There were positive points, too. For one, I would be forced to get out of my pajamas every day. (*ahem*) The particular job in question offered great benefits. And spending a few years working in an office again would end that gap I call "No Man's Land" in my work history - the big void that began when I quit my job in the spring of 2008 and will continue indefinitely.

That first week or so when I didn't get a phone call I was a little disappointed. I got over it quickly, though. I've been so busy with life and being a mom and wife and friend that I can't even imagine how I could do both - work full time and do all the other stuff. In fact, I'm not so far removed from that season of my life that I don't remember what it was like, and I can honestly say I couldn't do it all. All those years of trying just made me very very cranky. I'm not ready to put that kind of pressure on myself again.

Nope. I like things just the way they are. Is it an easy life? Nah. No one ever promised me it would be. But it is a good life. And for now I know I'm right where I need to be.

I love coupons!

You all know I am a frugal-minded mama. But I haven't posted much (or at all?) about using coupons because I'm not really sure what to say other than this: I love them!

I am not one of those women who gets all kinds of free stuff using coupons. I cannot get over the embarrassment I would feel over asking for three different transactions at Walgreens in order to get the most out of coupon-and-sale combinations. I don't know why. It's just a thing with me. I don't care when other people do it, but I won't. (Plus, I just don't like to shop that much - I like to get in, get my stuff, and get out.) Nor do I want to offer a how-to on coupon clipping or reports on which stores have the best sales; there are people who do this regularly on the Web and do a great job of it, and I would be happy to point anyone interested their way.

But today I just have to share my couponing success.

I am so blessed to have a friend who sends me coupons regularly, so between what she sends and what I can pilfer from my mom (ha!) and the coupons I get from the occasional Sunday paper I purchase, I have a pretty good stash going.

This is how I keep them:

 

I keep them like this because I had this old bill sorter lying around the house. Easy peasy.

I sort them by categories that work for me.

Often this is how my dining room table looks on a Saturday afternoon. I actually enjoy this. Which is good, because the time I spend sorting through coupons and matching them up with sales is worth the savings.

Especially this week.

It's been a few weeks since I last hit the grocery store, so I knew it was going to be a big trip. On top of that, it's fall and in the fall I always stock up on certain things, especially items I need for holiday baking.

I wanted to get it all done in one store. I chose Meijer because a quick glance at their ads showed some great deals and several items I wanted to stock up on. I spent some time last night perusing Meijer's Web site, adding items to my virtual grocery list (which I eventually printed out - LOVE that feature!) and organizing the largest stack of coupons I have ever used in one store.

This is how many coupons I used:

 

This is how much the coupons combined with the sales saved me:

I saved $92.48!! Totally worth the hour or so I spent getting it all organized.

For perspective, my out-of-pocket cost was $151.44, and my receipt tells me I took home 90 items which includes a $12 tub of cat litter (the priciest item).

Not bad, eh?

And to top off this sweet trip, as I was gathering my purchases at the checkout a sweet older couple came over to me and the woman handed me a $2.50 store coupon and said, "Could you use this next time?"

How cool is that?

I love coupons!

Color tour.

I shot these pictures with my phone out the window of the truck yesterday as I took kind of a round-a-bout way home from town.

They're not the best quality photos, but it gives you a little idea of the beauty we're experiencing here in Western Michigan these days.

 Seeing the fall colors in a four-season state is like our reward for enduring the winters here.

I love taking leisurely drives on the back country roads 

(which is ... oh ... all the roads around here).

This is a shot I say I'm going to take every year, and finally did. This is along the road we live on - I love how the hardwoods growing up on the edge of this pine forest provide bursts of color.

Hello, fall. I love you.